Open letter to the Coneheads:
Ya gotta give me a break. Give me something to write about. I'm turning into the Craig of the pen. Throw me a bone. Give up a lead. Come from behind. Go yard back to back to back. Hit a walkoff grand slam. Goose me. Something! Puleeeeeze?
How many times can I write about great hitting and defense? How can I write about starting the game with ten straight singles? Where is the drama in that? We lost one inning tonight 1-0. There is your drama of the evening.
I need G back, and not just for his blasts and his defense. I need him to come and get a key injury in the championship game. Now THAT is drama. Or come back and finish a fight. Hell, start a fight. I don't care. I just need some new material.
We blasted the poor saps du jour, the Angry Ground Balls, 23-5, and it wasn't that close. Almost all singles. Derek had the decency to hit a couple of deep balls late for doubles, and Sting joined him his last time up. Besides that it was 28 singles in four innings. A nifty .738 team average. The ten straight in the first with no outs is undoubtedly a team record. At least Gerry said I don't have to research it, it is obvious.
And I know how they got their nickname, the AGB. When we hit grounders, they were just too hot to handle for them, and thus the anger. That dirt must hold demons for them but to Chuck it's just another day at the office. We should change our name to Easy Ground Balls. Cause we make it look easy. As when Chuck and Randy turned a 6-4-3 DP with runners on first and second. I just wish I had an arm, because the lead runner strayed a little too far off third. Now that would have been a highlight, the 6-4-3-5 triple play. Doesn't happen every day, nor today. As it was they got runners to third with less than two outs at least twice and didn't score him.
Four hits were struck by Sting, Heavy D, the Knight and Heffe. D had six RBIs.
Joe had the longest (by time) fielder's choice in the history of softball. He hit a one hop shot to third, the baseman tagged the bag for the force, and threw in the dirt to first. The ball rolled away from the first baseman, neared the second baseman. Joe stopped hobbling, read the sportspage, had a beer, ran to the bathroom, gave himself the stink eye in the mirror, and still they hadn't picked up the ball. "Run, Joe, Run" came the chorus from the dugout. "Run it out like it matters!" Joe tiptoed to first. "Safe" came the cry of the ump. Another run to make it 9-0. And so it went.
And I didn't make that up. Well, some of it. But that is what you have driven me to. And truth be told, it's just fine by me. More (or less) drama next week.
Milestones:
Chuck 950 h (#1)
Lefty 150 ab (#22)
p.s. Happy Birthday Chuck.
Ya gotta give me a break. Give me something to write about. I'm turning into the Craig of the pen. Throw me a bone. Give up a lead. Come from behind. Go yard back to back to back. Hit a walkoff grand slam. Goose me. Something! Puleeeeeze?
How many times can I write about great hitting and defense? How can I write about starting the game with ten straight singles? Where is the drama in that? We lost one inning tonight 1-0. There is your drama of the evening.
I need G back, and not just for his blasts and his defense. I need him to come and get a key injury in the championship game. Now THAT is drama. Or come back and finish a fight. Hell, start a fight. I don't care. I just need some new material.
We blasted the poor saps du jour, the Angry Ground Balls, 23-5, and it wasn't that close. Almost all singles. Derek had the decency to hit a couple of deep balls late for doubles, and Sting joined him his last time up. Besides that it was 28 singles in four innings. A nifty .738 team average. The ten straight in the first with no outs is undoubtedly a team record. At least Gerry said I don't have to research it, it is obvious.
And I know how they got their nickname, the AGB. When we hit grounders, they were just too hot to handle for them, and thus the anger. That dirt must hold demons for them but to Chuck it's just another day at the office. We should change our name to Easy Ground Balls. Cause we make it look easy. As when Chuck and Randy turned a 6-4-3 DP with runners on first and second. I just wish I had an arm, because the lead runner strayed a little too far off third. Now that would have been a highlight, the 6-4-3-5 triple play. Doesn't happen every day, nor today. As it was they got runners to third with less than two outs at least twice and didn't score him.
Four hits were struck by Sting, Heavy D, the Knight and Heffe. D had six RBIs.
Joe had the longest (by time) fielder's choice in the history of softball. He hit a one hop shot to third, the baseman tagged the bag for the force, and threw in the dirt to first. The ball rolled away from the first baseman, neared the second baseman. Joe stopped hobbling, read the sportspage, had a beer, ran to the bathroom, gave himself the stink eye in the mirror, and still they hadn't picked up the ball. "Run, Joe, Run" came the chorus from the dugout. "Run it out like it matters!" Joe tiptoed to first. "Safe" came the cry of the ump. Another run to make it 9-0. And so it went.
And I didn't make that up. Well, some of it. But that is what you have driven me to. And truth be told, it's just fine by me. More (or less) drama next week.
Milestones:
Chuck 950 h (#1)
Lefty 150 ab (#22)
p.s. Happy Birthday Chuck.
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