Step One of Four - The Way is Cleared

This is Lefty with his playoff Game Face on:



This is Lefty catching a fly ball:


Smooth as silk

This is Lefty hitting, in his mind's eye:

This is Lefty with two strikes Monday night:


This is where Lefty ended up with three strikes, and YER OUT:

You might think that this post is all about Lefty, and his uncomfortable looking strike three swing...but as usual Craig is all about providing comic relief.

It's really about Randy and the game he had. On a night when our hitting was somewhat out of sorts, he went 3-3 with the defining blow to put us ahead 10-6 in the bottom of the second. It was a three run homer to deep left center, scoring Larry and Chuck after we had taken the lead on a perfectly placed line drive double right on the right field line by Larry.

After Randy's long ball, Larry held the Snorts to two runs over the next three innings, and it was all but over. He had one inning where he got the 2-3-4 hitters to fly into three straight can of popcorn outs. I think he needed but four pitches that inning. His clutch pitching against those guys caused their best hitter (batting 5th) to bat three times leading off innings with the bases empty. Of note is he barely beat Bruce in LC early on, and Pope ran one down nearly to field five on his last AB.

The other big blow was Bruce's gap shot triple in the first that gave us our first lead, and set the tone of winning every inning (we won or tied every one except the third).

Randy also turned two outstanding plays - a tough hot shot that he made look routine for a 5-3 putout in the top of the fourth, and catching a pop up against the fence in the fifth. Most guys at our level shy away from the fence on that play. To complete his night he even drew a bases loaded walk for an RBI in the sixth as we put up three insurance runs to get to the final score of 15-8.

Chuck stayed very hot - matching Randy's 3-3+BB and scoring three runs. Best Acting Oscar in a supporting role goes to D for somehow selling the back end of a double play in the third to end that frame. How he did that from two feet off the base, I'll never know, but whatever works! Must have been the lights shining off his pate. Temporary umpire blindness. Pretty bright out there.

We are back in action against Dub MD Monday, and it can't come soon enough. Cream and Clear bowed out early in week one. The Way is Cleared. But Dub MD will be gunning for us - don't forget it was they who two years ago beat us in the first round and forced us to beat them twice to snatch the title from the losers' bracket.

Milestone:
Lefty        250 h (#18)

Almost Got The Ringer

There is an expression that goes "close only counts in horseshoes and hand grenades." War metaphor aside, Transdyn did come close to Cotton this fall despite being bumped to the Upper league and our 1-4 start. We just couldn't get that horseshoe to drop in the right place.

Appropriately enough the team that put us out, once again, was the Ringers. We had a ton of momentum going into the playoffs with our gaudy five game winning streak and victories over every other team including the first place Sons of Pitches, twice. I'm sure they were relieved to see us gone for the championship game, even though the Ringers are younger and faster, etc.

The dread Transdyn disease reared its ugly head once again. For some reason, our hitting shuts down in the playoffs, more often than not. We have suffered at the hands of the Ringers now 17-2, and 18-1 in Spring 2014 and to the Brews Brothers 16-0 in Fall 2013. I just can't explain it. We are simply better than that. Apparently the pressure of Recreational Playoff Softball is just too much for us. I think I will look into a professional sports shrink for next year. Or maybe a hypnotist. Or maybe we will reward everyone on the team a cash prize or so many virgins for each hit. Get the checkbook ready, Monty.

Or, maybe we will just let it all go next time and play like ourselves. There must have been some highlights but none were on the offensive side of the ball game. Jason had a nice double to open the game and it was all downhill after that. We all batted twice, no one more, and Pauly and Mark were the only ones with multiple hit games.

On defense the Ringers kept trying to pick on Cage for some reason, and he just kept running everything down. It would have been much worse without him roaming center field. Jason made a nifty 6U-3 double play and that was about it. They just kept hitting and we didn't, that simple.

It doesn't take away from our heroic effort to get into the playoffs, and finish only a half game out of first place. We tied our all time high in wins for the entire year, and also for fewest losses with an overall record of 20-5. Not too shabby.

But the playoff loss just gives us more incentive for next year. Anyone with any ideas on how to break this trend, please submit your entries to this blog. There will be prizes.

See you next year.

Milestone:
Heffe        750 h (#1)

That Time of Year

I had a dream last night. The Giants and my Cardinals were playing in the NLCS for the National League pennant. I was barbecuing some chicken. The game was coming on and I couldn't decide how I would continue to barbecue with the game on. Then I realized that I just had assumed the Giants and Cardinals would be in the NLCS, because they have been often in the last few years, but actually it was the Mets and Cubs. I didn't have to worry about missing dinner.

Pan out and you could see over the fence I had a neighbor that was a Dodger fan. He was also barbecuing, but there were like giant white pillows or marshmallows floating around his head, and he had nothing on the grill. So it wasn't a nightmare. He was chanting something like "Kershaw and Greinke, and pray for...Kershaw and Greinke." It didn't rhyme at all.

All of which is to say that although the Giants and Cardinals are not in the hunt any more, the Coneheads remain the constant. We finished off another undefeated season, albeit with the *asterisk-tie, and handed Pat's Bats a death blow to their playoff hopes, 21-13 (or 20-13 depending on if you believe the official scorer or our book).

In the beginning, we spotted them a 4-0 lead. Since we had already clinched first place seeding for the playoffs, the game had no meaning (other than to avenge our loss in last year's playoffs to Pat's Bats) for us. A few years ago, in the Walnut Creaker (over 50) league, my team was in the playoff consolation game for third place (they played for such silliness because either the Old Guys need the exercise or they are the true softball sluts, not sure which). We were not exactly playing hard and were way behind. Apparently, I spouted out, "You guys are playing this like this is a meaningless game." We went on to come back and win the game. Our pitcher, Don Clay, said that that was the funniest thing he had ever heard on a softball field. I forgot all about it, but he brings it up now and then when I see him on the field.

I say this because I kept expecting to hear this Monday night from someone. But it did not come. Instead a Conehead inning erupted in the bottom of the third for eleven, or twelve, runs. Yours truly started the fun with a nine hopper through the infield. Then everyone else in the lineup got a hit until it came around to me again. Chopper had a run scoring double in the beginning and the Buddha had a Conehead triple that cleared the bases later, making it 10-4. Or 11-4. I hate when the book doesn't agree with the scorekeeper, but at least in this case it was in our favor.

You have to give credit to Pat and his Bats - they kept coming back. Four in the fourth (which we answered with four of our own), and five in the fifth made it fifteen, or sixteen, to thirteen going into the sixth. But Larry induced a couple of popups and an easy fly ball, and they were done. We batted until time ran out in the sixth for a final score of 21-13. Or 20-13. Depending.

Chopper had the play of the game, when he nabbed a foul tip going by to record an out. D gets extra credit for not going ballistic when they intentionally walked him not once but twice in the late going. They call it recreational softball. And not to take anything from D, but he is not the only hitter in our lineup, and Knight made them pay once with a followup triple, and once with a run scoring single. It may have been the worst plays called since Sunday's Indianapolis Colts fake punt with only the center on the line

And if you believe in numbers, the Mets just finished off the Cubs in a sweep. They are in the World Series for the first time since 2000. That happens to be my rookie season on the Coneheads when we went undefeated and swept the playoffs. I like the signs.

Milestones:
Heffe          650 r (#2)
Heffe          1000 h (#2)
Chopper     40 2b (#17)
Knight        150 r (#20)
Randy        100 h (#24)
Randy        150 ab (#27)

Momentum

For the fifth week in a row, Transdyn put together a great game and for the second time in a row upset the first place team, Sons of Pitches, 12-8. With our five game winning streak in tow, we ended the regular season a half game out of first place behind the Sons and the Ringers who tied at 6-3-1.

We are poised to make a run in the one night playoff tournament next week. We have beaten both teams recently, and they have to have doubts in their minds.

We didn't really hit like we are capable last night (nor the season as a whole), except the monster Bert, more on that later. But what separated us this night was our defense. Cage ran like a gazelle covering the whole middle of the field with at least three tremendous catches. Jason took control of a bases loaded one out smash up the middle, grabbed it, stepped on second and threw to D at first in one smooth motion to kill a late rally. Mark absolutely robbed our ex-teammate Donnie with a leap at second to snare a live drive. Chopper ranged far into foul ground to catch a fly ball, and made a couple of other running catches in right field. I even got into the act at first base, falling to my knees and stretching for a rare wide throw from Jay. And there was the play at the plate to nail the Sons' SS, who clobbered one over Chopper's head but his throw to Mark and then the relay to Monty along with some fancy footwork by Monty robbed him of a home run and ended the inning. Unfortunately, the SS was hurt on the play, could be serious, and he is D and Bert and Brian's tournament teammate; we wish him a speedy recovery, but we are glad he was out.

All the while the Sons were throwing the ball around and kicking it this way and that, and that is what made the difference in the game. In one sequence, on a shallow fly to left, Pauly hesitated a little after he tagged up to go home. The throw was just a tad late. In the mean time Chopper went to third and the catcher heaved it back into left field. Chopper kept running and the throw back to home sailed over everyone. It was a Keystone Kop moment.

And, we had the Bomber. Albert lit up the night with two huge two run blasts over the fence in left. That was your run differential right there. He also hit a sac fly to total five RBIs, and started a three run rally in the third with a laced hit to RC.

I like our momentum and our chances next week. We are due to have a big hitting game again too. And I'd put Tom up against any pitcher in the league right now. We haven't allowed more than eight runs in a game since mid-September, and led the league with the fewest runs allowed.

Let the fun begin!

Milestones:
10/6
Coop      110 bb (#2)

Pauly       250 r (#7)
Rene        20 2b (#18)

Rene        100 h (#25)

10/13
Bert         10 hr (#8)
Pauly       200 g (#9)
Tom        50 rbi (#31)

You guys think if you just show up...

...we'll win.

Ever since we had that tie, our fearless leader Joe has been especially ornery. We are like his flock, and everything we do is to please him but nothing is good enough. Maybe it's ever since we didn't get Cotton last year in this league and in the Orinda Summer League - he takes losing hard, and this is what he came up to inspire us.

Think about it though, we could start a whole new trend in sports...just show up! and expect to win!

We need to talk to Steve Kerr. How can the Warriors repeat as NBA champions? Just show up! The other teams will just lie down! I'll bet my last dollar he hasn't thought about that strategy. We could be on to something.

And take the 49ers...please. If they had 'just shown up' they couldn't have done worse than in a couple of their games, against the Steelers and the Falcons and even in the Green Bay game. In fact, I am not sure they did show up in those games. So if they had...who knows? Maybe Roethlisberger and Ryan and Rodgers are so surprised to see the 49ers they start throwing picks left and right.

Joe makes you think a little of Yogi Berra. Joe is from Brooklyn, Yogi plied his trade mostly in the Big Apple, although most of his years were in the Bronx as we all know.

Yogi said, "It ain't over til it's over."

Joe said (when we were up 22-5 going into the last inning), "If we hold them to less than two runs, we'll win." Really?

So yes, I'm afraid that Joe's words putting us in our place must have inspired us. Down 4-0 after 2 1/2 innings, we put up fourteen and eight runs in the next two to put the Bunt Pirates out of their misery. Final score 22-6 (whew).

What does Bunt Pirates mean anyway? There's no bunting in softball. Maybe that's their problem.

In the fourteen run Conehead third, Larry started things off with a walk. Then the merry-go-round continued with three singles and two walks, until Ol' G came up and promptly cleared the bases with a two run double. That put us ahead to stay, and we batted all the way back around to G before we were done. Randy had the other big hit, a two run triple in the gap.

Similarly in the 4th, Heffe started it with a walk and we worked the bases loaded, and up stepped Larry who cleared all three runners with a double to right. Pope and D had back to back two run hits, a double and a triple, respectively. D's in particular was a shot, back spinning nearly to the trees in right field. He had been drooling over how shallow they were playing him the whole game to that point.

Chuck, Pope, Chopper and Larry had perfect games (each walked once and hit in the rest of their ABs). Chuck is as hot as we have seen him in a while, he hasn't made an out for weeks. The webgems included a running catch by Pope nearly to Field 5 behind us, and for laughs, Bruce took a few steps in one one fly ball that started to sail on him, and made a nice recovery to nab it.

We clinched first with a week left at 6-0-1. We play Pats Bats in the last regular season game, and this game is huge for them. If we win, we likely will knock them out off the playoffs. Four teams make it, and they are in third but just a half game ahead of HBF and Dub MD behind them, who both should win their games. I still think we owe them for sending us reeling out of control in last year's playoffs. Payback time.

All in all, we showed up...and we won...in typical Conehead fashion. As long as we keep those 14 and 8 and 20 run innings coming, I think we'll be all right. And we can always look forward to Joe's next "Yogi-ism."

That is, if you show up.

Milestones:
Heffe       400 g (#3)
Ol' G       800 ab (#12)
Ol' G       60 2b (#12)
D             250 r (#15)

One Word - Wow

I wanted to do it, Pope had the ultimate blog idea: I got a rare triple so the title would be "Triple" and that would be it. No body. That might be fitting Conehead tradition (look at me, look at me!). But it just wouldn't be right when the team just went off tonight. Thirty nine runs on 44 hits. An 11 run Conehead inning in the first (ten with two outs) but we were just warming up. We had TWENTY ONE straight hits to start the fourth inning, and by that time we had scored twenty runs. I think somewhere in the back of my mind I remember a 24 run inning on one of my teams, but never twenty before an out was recorded.

Think I should focus on the defense in this game Chuck? (Although Bruce did make a highlight catch in the first going back on a ball, and Pope did the same later in left, and Lefty made a shoe-top catch in the early going).

Eight through twelve hitters (Bruce, Heffe, Chopper, Buddha, and Gene) were 19-19 plus a walk with four doubles, two triples, and two homers. In front of them Lefty and G were 7-9 and behind them Larry/Joe were 3-4 and then Chuck was also 4-4 (plus a walk).

Someone had to make the outs but no one was worse than 2-4. D was the only 2-4 but he had the sac fly that was the game winner as the fourth batter of the game. And hobbled to second and third on his two hits, plus provided the gallows humor as the courtesy runner for yours truly and Joe in the first.

It goes on and on - big bombs from Pope and D and Bruce, and a slicer on the line by Chopper, and I hit the line in right for the triple. Buddha just slashed and burned them for two doubles.

Don't know what else to say. But the lesson is the other team better not try to come back after a Conehead inning (they had a nine run second to 'narrow' the margin to 18-12) - we truly let the dogs out tonight.

And, for good measure, the team batting average was .815.

And to prove what dogs we are - the biggest laugh of the post-game chatter was "We should get their beer - No WE SHOULD GET THEIR WOMEN"..amen.

Milestones:
Pope        950 ab (#7)
D             30 3b (#8)
D             10 gw (#12)
Chopper  450 ab (#18)
Lefty        350 ab (#20)

In The Driver's Seat*

For the Coneheads, the last couple of wins have been as important as any regular season softball games can be (which is to say...). We sent Dub MD packing 18-14 (wasn't that close, a 12 run Conehead inning did in WMD). And even more importantly, this week we walked off on the Cream and Clear, last year's champs, 12-11.

The thing about the Coneheads is, though, that we are older than all the competition, and even though we have a lot of talent in the lineup, I think we need to step up the intimidation factor on these youngsters. In time for the playoffs, when the games really count.

Seems like we have new uniforms every season, and soon many of us devolve into wearing whatever shirt happens to have gotten washed that week. We need a unifying, signature look. So here is what I am proposing - new hats. They will look like this:

Now you may laugh, but really can you see the distraction it will cause for the other teams?

And - bonus - the girls love them:

This could be you!

Speaking of guys with issues with their bald heads,

Derek carried the day in Monday's game. After inheriting a 3-3 tie from Joe, he gave up a three run rally in the top of the third, but settled down for a couple of scoreless innings after that.

Going into the bottom of the fifth, we trailed by a run, and back to back two run doubles by Lefty and Randy put us up by three. Not exactly a Conehead inning. It seemed tenuous and proved to be so, as the Clear came roaring back and matched that output to retake a one run lead. But we had the secret weapon. Joe re-entered the game at the mound, and shut them down in the seventh. I don't even remember them getting anyone on base.

In the bottom of the seventh, Pope gave it up to take a walk to lead off, putting the tying run on base. D singled him to third, and Randy put one deep into the outfield to make sure game was tied on his sac fly. Lefty followed up with another single sending the winning run to third, setting the stage for Ol' G, one of our RBI machines. I'm sure he had visions of a single to center or another fly ball to sacrifice the game winner home but just to make it interesting, he hit a hard grounder to second. With one out, Cream and Clear tried to turn the DP instead of going home, but G hustled up the line and beat out the relay throw and another win was in the books. Walk off FC!

Lefty led the way with four hits, including a double and a triple - he takes that lineup demotion very seriously. In fact, he is a very serious guy. Downright analytical. Like, he thinks, "Which team has the most post-game beer?" That's where I need to be..." He also drove in four of our eleven runs. No one else had more than two hits, but everyone was on base at least once.

The previous game featured Bruce with five RBIs on a double and a triple, Randy with 4 RBIs on 2 doubles, a single and a sac fly, and Pope and Chopper going 3-3. They accounted for eight of the twelve RBIs in the Conehead inning.

With H.B.F. losing we are in first place alone. For you Coneheads that means it's simple - if we win out, we will have the top seed for the playoffs. Keep that under your (new) hat.

Milestones:
9/21
Pope        500 r (#5)
Chopper   250 rbi (#17)

9/28
Ol' G        10 gw (#12)
D              20 sf (#13)
Lefty         40 2b (#16)
Chopper   200 r (#17)

*Note: In the Conehead movie, Beldar Conehead was both a "respected taxi driver" (Wikipedia) and driving instructor...

Streaking...

Somehow the Transdyn team disappeared for a month. I didn't know where it went. I kept looking. Under rocks, on the bay, up mountains and down in the valley. Did anyone else see them from August 11th to September 8th? Not I...however..

We awoke from our slumber, and played three very good games in a row. Back is our solid defense, and our clutch hitting up and down the lineup, and especially, our pitching.

Last week Tom followed up his excellent outing against the Sons of Pitches with a beatdown of another old rival, the Brews Bros. The result was an 18-7 game that was never close. We followed up a three run first with a seven run second and never looked back.

The core of our lineup dominated this game. Cage (who is this season's hottest hitter), D and Berto combined for 11 hits, 10 runs, and 11 RBIs, including a bomb by Alberto. Jas and Brian each had three hits to set the table for the big guys.

This week's game was more of the same. Solid defense. Brian made yet another far ranging play on a popup to shallow center. The best play wasn't an out but deserves mention anyway. It was a deep fly to right that Coop got to cutoff Jason and he threw a strike to me at home. Unfortunately, the Ringer runner didn't even test us since they were down about 19-3 a the time. He would have been out by ten feet.

The game MVP was Derek, as he came out of the weeds to take the mound, with Tom out of town and Sir Guy still really on the DL. He owned the Ringers. That team scored 29 runs one game and 31 in another, just two weeks ago. They couldn't do anything last night but mostly lift easy fly balls to our outfielders. Of course they managed to hit a few up the middle to try to test Big D, but he didn't flinch. It helps that he is still taking his meds. He wanted to go at it with them too. They wouldn't have a chance, except they are very young and fast so they could have easily run away from him.

Back to the game. The wrinkle this week was that the entire lineup was productive. Maybe there is something to the theory that you should only bat ten. We scored at least two every inning. Must say that the Ringers helped - they did not seem very interested in catching the ball - but all but one of us had at least two hits.

D led the way at the plate too - he had four hits in five innings, and the only out he made was a laser in the last plate appearance for our offense - it ended the six run fifth that qualified us to finish the slaughter rule shortened game. It was a seed all the way to the right fielder who was camped at the fence in right.

As I said, Cage also stayed hot. Similar to D, the only unproductive out he made (he also had a sac fly), was a bomb. At least it sounded like it off the bat, but the mush properties of the ball Pleasanton uses knocked it down and the left fielder tracked down his drive at the fence. His hits were line drives mostly, with runners on, as he knocked in four runs. Well, one was a Heffe special, it was a line drive only in the book but that bloop scored two.

There was only one player who didn't make an out - I'll let you guess who that is. Although there is an asterisk on one of his plate appearances - he was helped by one of the Ringers' gifts.

Not going to say too much about how much one player means, just gonna say that we are undefeated when Bert takes the field. And winless without. But then again Mark, out latest super sub, can nearly say the same thing. We are 4-1 with him in the lineup.

Bottom line is that we have to talent to be competitive in this league despite our complaints about being old and being bumped up to the higher level league. The momentum we have built the last three weeks can be leveraged for the rest of the season and the playoffs.

It starts next week with a game vs. Pleasanton Auto Mall. They are by far the worst team in the league, at 1-6. Yet we have our worst record head to head (1-3) against them. We are 3-3 against the Sons of Pitches, 4-4 against the Brew Bros., and 6-5 against the Ringers. So let's get this win, and continue on our way. I love the smell of cotton in the Fall.

Milestones:
9/22
Heffe        1350 ab (#2)

9/29
Coop        400 g (#2)
Jas            500 ab (#11)