The Revue

This is as close as I ever got to Tina Turner.

Sidebar - she was actually born Anna Mae Bullock and lived much of her childhood and then the beginning of her career with Ike Turner in St. Louis, MO, my home town. And my family and extended family had a 'cleaning lady' named Anna Mae Williams (she worked for my aunt and my baba too) , a very buxom black woman who essentially was my after school care, when my suburban mother went wherever suburban housewives went with their friends in the afternoon, which was usually shopping.

But I digress.

Years later in my twenties, I drove a cab nights in San Francisco while supporting myself in years 3-5 of being a Senior at UC Berkeley. One rainy night in January, I picked up an African American couple right in front of the ACT Theater, which was the cornerstone of San Francisco's theater district. They wanted to go to Bay View, which was a very sketchy part of town. Bay View was interesting in that it was just up the hill from Hunters' Point, which was one of the few East Coast type housing projects in SF. Interesting in that it looked  harmless enough - modern apartment buildings that were not rundown looking at all. But it was just as dangerous as Hunter's Point, appearances aside.

So the couple gets in my cab, but she (who was a very heavyset woman) gets in the back and immediately passes out all over the seat. In the meantime the man gets in the passenger seat next to me. I am terrified by now, but I was so naïve that I only once of twice ever refused to take a fare to a destination.

He starts to tell me how he was the bass player in Ike and Tina Turners' band. And he wants to sing "Rollin' Down the River" and he wants me to join in.

So there I am shaking in my boots and singing at the top of my lungs "I left a good job in the city,

Working for the man every night and day..." and driving the five miles or so to Bay View. We get to the designated street, which has to be the narrowest street in SF, and has parked cars wall to wall up and down the street, and he suddenly says "Pull in here" into a driveway. By now it's raining. He says, he has to run in to get the money for the ride. Ok, then. Now I am waiting, and waiting and suddenly a car comes down the street and stops right behind me on the street. I'm totally boxed in. I am sure that this is part of the setup and I can see the headlines - "College Kid Destroyed in Bay View While Rolling Down the River."

But the car eventually moves on. Whew. I am debating should I just chalk it up to naivety and move on with my health intact? And then he re-emerges. He comes to the driver's side window. "Roll it down so I can talk to you." I am not about to expose any more than absolutely necessary. I roll it down the tiniest crack. "I need $20 in change so I can give my friend change for a twenty to give you." (the fare was $5 or $6 and something in change). I weigh this in my mind. On the one hand, $20. On the other, my life. Hmm, not much of a debate, and I slide the money through the sliver of open window. It really didn't even make any sense, but what the hell, I am beyond logic at this point. He disappears into the house again, and then quickly comes back out, but instead of returning to the cab, he turns right and disappears between two houses down the street. Well, I guess he got his fix, on me.

Now I have the woman in the back of my cab. I figure well, if she is still alive, I maybe could get the fare from her. But I am not about to wake her up, and make a beeline to the nearest known police station. I go into the precinct, and tell them my story. They are sympathetic and go out and roust her out of my cab. She struggles into the station and they take her to the other side of the room. The cop comes over to me and says, "she has no money on her." So that is that, I did escape with my life, $20 lighter. He tells me that she has a rap sheet as long as my arm, including felony armed robbery and multiple assaults with a deadly weapon. And that is just her. He asks if I want to press charges. I say, "no need really, I am not about to confront her in court." but he says I don't have to show up, but it least she will have to (or just add to the long list?) I say sure, whatever. He looks at me quizzically, and says, "I don't know who has the worse job, you or me," and I answer, "You do", I can drive away now.